Confidence Counts Week eight
Posted: 4th October 2026
Last week we spoke about learning and its okay not to get it right first time, who does? That often we need to practice whatever it is we are learning before we become confident to do it and that is how confidence grows, by practicing and learning when things do not go to plan. As ever, this wee post is not a replacement for professional advice, it is for self-reflection and selfcare.
There can be times when we create obstacles for ourselves. or give our own self confidence a hard time with the way we talk to ourselves. Becoming aware of our inner voice is so important for building confidence and self-esteem. The link below takes you to a video on becoming aware of the inner voice.
We all have an inner voice. It chats away to us all the time. Become more aware of your own inner voice. is it male, female, gender neutral, happy, sad, confident, shy, supportive, critical? Developing self-confidence means overcoming our self-limiting beliefs and self-doubts. Make an effort to create, listen to and learn to use a kinder inner voice. It can become a valuable ally for our learning and development.
Points for reflection
- What does my inner voice sound like?
- My inner voice makes me feel……….
- If I used a kinder inner voice, it would……….
Creating and using a kinder inner voice is one of the most powerful things we can do to advance our self-care. What does your inner voice usually say to you when things don’t go as planned or hoped? How does this make you feel? Now, think about the new things you would like your inner voice to tell you. How would that positive voice make you feel? The chart below can help you better understand the connection between your inner voice and the way you feel.
| Negative self-talk | How it can make you feel |
| No point trying, it will fail | Miserable and deflated |
| They will laugh at me | Ashamed, embarrassed |
| I will not be able to handle this if it does not work | Afraid |
| I knew this would not work | Hopeless |
| I can’t do that | Defeated |
| No one likes you | Alone |
Now lets see what a positive inner voice can do
| Positive self-talk | How it can make you feel |
| Never tried this before, let’s see how it goes | Curious maybe a wee bit excited |
| I am not the only person to have tried this for the first time | Reassured |
| When I can learn to do this, or find a way to adapt it will be great | Hopeful |
| Okay, that didn’t go to plan, what else can I do? | Determined |
| I gave it my best shot and it didn’t work the way I had hoped | Sense of achievement for trying and plans for what next |
| We cannot control how others behave, it is their problem not mine, and I don’t expect to get on with everyone | Content |
Using words or pictures to reveal and describe your negative self-talk. Then, fill in the chart below with your ideas and hopes about how you could change your inner voice to become more inspiring and strengthen your CAN-DO attitude. Self-confidence doesn’t mean things will always go as planned. You know life is not like that for anyone. Instead, self-confidence means we accept what’s true and then can choose to do something positive about the things within our control.
Point for reflection
If it has meaning for you, take some time to reflect and complete your own table to help become aware of the discouraging things you may say to yourself AND the more uplifting alternatives your inner voice could tell you when your negative self-talk gets in the way.
| Negative self-talk | How it makes me feel |
Now think about the power that positive self talk could offer you
| Positive self-talk | How it makes me feel |
New situations can sometimes impact on our self-confidence, so we shall look at that next week. For now, be kind to you as you are more capable and awesome than you often give yourself credit for.
Thanks for reading, remember you do matter
Hilda
Expires: 2026-12-31
More Information: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SEqa1u-i5MM
Contact: www.linkedin.com/in/hilda-campbell-0a5557329